How I’d advise the country’s fattest city

Men’s Fitness magazine has just named Las Vegas the nation’s "fattest" city. The findings should Bh8892 come as no surprise since, with the exceptions of those brutal trade shows, most visitors to America’s Sodom & Gomorrah do litte, if any, walking while gorging on high calorie, high fat $1.99 breakfasts.

So, I ask: should the powers that be who run this money mecca care about their new brand positioning? I would think so: a fitter clientele would mean longer lives, less healthcare costs and more energy to feed the one-arm bandits 24×7.

In fact, if I were advising the City fathers, I’d suggest the following:

1) put clocks back in the casinos and suggest that gamblers get up, stretch and walk to a different ‘pit’ every 20 minutes

2) put heart-healthy snacks within arms’ reach of the gamblers.

3) stage a cocktail waitress 10k race on the Strip

4) offer to match the winnings of any gambler who also can prove he/she worked out at least once while vacationing in Sin City

5) encourage Steve Wynn to call his next hotel K-2, and put the casino at the very top of the building thereby forcing gamblers to climb staircases to lose pounds before also losing their hard-earned money.

I have to believe being labeled America’s fattest city is a real bummer for Vegas. It certainly doesn’t reinforce the glamorous, exotic branding they’ve been propagating for years. In fact, if they don’t stem the tide soon, gamblers may start dying of heart attacks right on the casino floors. The cause, however, won’t be the shock of winning or the grief of losing, but simply their morbidly obese bodies crapping out.

Until they start making some changes, I suggest Las Vagas be renamed Lost Waistlines.

7 thoughts on “How I’d advise the country’s fattest city

  1. Cool material and type of writing. There’s no doubt I’ll check back on this site in the future
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  2. I have a better idea that may actually make your med supply business expand faster than some of those Vegas waistlines. Why not supply all of the Vegas slot machines with your medical gloves? You can position the slots as not only being germ free but, in fact, the safest in the world. Since obese people are more susceptible to catching cold and flus as a result of their damaged immune systems, it could be the perfect value add for America’s fattest city. Gotta think outside the box, I-man.

  3. in must be nice being such a good spin master in an industry filled with spinners. here’s why- if anyone goes and reads the article, they will find that the survey was compiled based on the following: how much residents are exercising, how healthy they eat, how many gym memberships in a city, how much junk food people consume, and how much time they spend sitting in traffic.
    first, there is ZERO mention of visitors being calculated into the findings.
    second, let’s just say that you have half a valid point in that you were talking about visitors becoming residents. going with that thinking, how can you possibly say they are hurting the situation? someone correct me if im wrong, but if vegas is the fattest city, then new residents from other cities can only HELP the situation.
    let’s take this one step further. had the repman bothered to read and report on all the findings of the survey, he would have found the top 10 most FIT cities are:
    1. Albuquerque
    2. Seattle
    3. Colorado Springs
    4. Minneapolis
    5. Tucson
    6. Denver
    7. San Francisco
    8. Baltimore
    9. Portland
    10. Honolulu
    anyone notice that 7 out of these 10 are pretty close in proximity to vegas. so if visitors are becoming residents, i would guess that the fit neighbors might move to vegas and help the city.
    bottom line is this- the repman once again had nothing to write about so he found a headline and without knowing or reading the facts, devoted a blog to it. and once again he has been called out on it. interestingly enough, even the lunch idiot hasn’t rushed to the repman’s defense- even to blast my grammar.
    repman, maybe follow your age old advice and admit error on this one. and then you can go on a speaking tour about negative blogging, and set up a non-profit, etc. etc…

  4. It must be nice to go through life as worldly wise as you are, med supply exec. Question: which city has the fastest-growing population in the country and which has the most transients? And, how many of the newly-arrived Las Vegas residents have been past tourists and, for whatever reason, fallen in love with the place? Today’s tourist is tomorrow’s resident. Hence the rationale for the post and the advice contained therein.

  5. great points andrew, all dead on! add vegas to this week’s list of items the repman has commented on, without knowing the full facts.
    as andrew said, none of the tourists could care about vegas being the fattest city. in fact, i bet most tourists don’t even know there is a city besides the strip. all the tourists care about is getting from the airport to the strip and taking their vacation. in terms of the 10k waitress run, if you have been to vegas, you would know most waitresses don’t need to do much running.
    and since you posed about how you would advise them, i would advise you to rethink your post. everything you wrote about was how to help the tourists/visitors trim down, and i don’t think the survey was about the wasitlines of the tourists.
    lunch moron- grammar comments…

  6. No doubt many of the residents are obese, but does this survey factor in the hundreds of thousands of tourists who take over the strip each year?
    People go to Vegas for pleasure and overindulgence. I don’t think the “fat” tag hurts the city too much. It actually plays to the fact that people leave Vegas fat (as in your bankroll).
    As long as the overweight townies stay away from the hotel pools and dancing poles, I think the city’s rep will be just fine…