Christ should charge a commission

Jesus Christ should receive a commission from all the celebs and sports figures who have invoked HisChrist
name, asked His forgiveness and/or turned their lives over to Him.

Michael Vick is just the latest fallen superstar to have miraculously ‘found’ Christ amidst the rubble of rack and ruin.

Sadly, Christ has become part of a formulaic crisis response plan being implemented by the PR firms and publicists of Messrs. Vick, Gibson and others.

Rather than placing himself in the hands of the Lord, though, Vick would be better served by donating a significant sum of money to animal rights.

Hiding behind the Good Shepherd’s robe may be smart image counseling, but it’s been tried one too many times in recent years to ring true.

As the bible says, ‘The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away.’ In Vick’s case, the lord, in the person of NFL Commissioner Goodell, has clearly taketh away and, all the contrition in the world won’t get it back anytime soon for Brother Vick."

Vick also told courthouse gatherers that his dog-fighting dilettantism was "immature," and he has some growing up to do. Indeed. Part of growing up is learning to say "sorry," but that’s a word you won’t often find in defense lawyers’ vocab list. On the other hand, as the Christlike Vick must surely know, the bible mentions contrition in a few thousand places.

3 thoughts on “Christ should charge a commission

  1. Along with this, I had planned to eat a bigger than usual portion at the next meal.
    And it’s this negative association with dieting calendar which can often make it such a bad choice for losing weight. The Lap-Band does not tell you what to do and feel good with the results. Or perhaps you want to see results right away. The best way to get dieting calendar the body of free radicals.

  2. Surely most politicians will have found God already, it’s a key part of their campaigns!
    A cursory glance at those hoping to stand in the US Presidential elections next year, and the content of much of the incumbent’s speeches, certainly suggests so…

  3. What is the over/under on timing for Sen. Larry Craig to find Jesus?
    I’d give it a day or less!