Mick Cody is one angry dog. The five-year-old pit bull is incensed over Governor Sarah Palin’s recent comments at the Republican National Convention: "You know what they say the difference is between a hockey mom and a pit bull? Lipstick."
Cody, who is co-founder and managing partner of the National Pit Bull Awareness Association (NPAA), says Palin’s negative remarks perpetuate misleading stereotypes. "We’ve worked tirelessly to change people’s misconceptions about pit bulls. If treated decently, we’re warm, compassionate and caring creatures, unlike a certain Alaskan politician."
Mick was reached for comment in Ohio, where he’d been addressing a local NPAA chapter. "The major parties and media are totally overlooking a powerful (and, I do mean powerful) voting block. Palin’s comments not only antagonize pit bulls, but they anger the 50 million dogs currently residing in America. And, critically, many of my fellow canines are of voting age (editor’s note: that would be three years old or older)."
Cody says the NPAA has offered speaking opportunities to both parties, but has been turned down cold: "Not so much as a whimper from either camp," he snarled.
As a result, Mick says he’s taking matters into his own paws and, along with his new eight-week-old little brother, Rooney, making a run for the presidency. "It’s time canines had a chance to run things. Sure, our life expectancies may not enable us to last for a full two terms, but we’d do a better job than the current occupants," he howled.
When questioned about his youthful running mate’s qualifications for the VP slot, Mick snapped: "Rooney’s been around for three months. That’s almost a full year in human terms. How much more experience does the hockey mom have?" Mick added that the only thing Rooney hasn’t mastered yet is field dressing a moose. "But, give the little guy some time," he chuckled.
The Mick/Rooney ticket hopes to hold a quick convention in the Cody backyard ("Our mom’s promised to clean it up first with a pooper scooper," noted Rooney.). They’ve also developed a campaign theme they say "….runs rings" around the others: "Paws for a change."
Mick says the double entendre will resonate with humans, canines and the all-important undecided Feline vote.
"Pit Bulls specifically, and dogs in general, are mad as hell with negative stereotypes. It’s time to muzzle Palin and her breed once and for all," concluded Cody.
Thx Lunch. I didn’t know about the doggy aging differential. That’s helpful. Mick is like McCain. He’s got a few years on him, but is still a robust figure. And, little Rooney’s got just as much piss and vinegar as Ms. Palin. I’m confident the Mick-Rooney team are the right solution for today’s challenges.
Remember to clean up after Mick leaves his office.
Also, did you read the Journal article about how 1 human year does not equal 7 canine years? In fact, it ranges all over the place. For instance, a Golden Retriever and Doberman age almost 20 canine years during one of ours.
I wonder how more quickly they would age if dealing with the stress the Oval Office provides?