Mick vs. Vick: When the very worst becomes the very best

Novick 6a00d8341c39e853ef01348470b581970cThe National Football League has a fascinating image and reputation  conundrum on its hands.    There's a very real possibility that ex-con, Michael Vick, the most villainous and vilified player in league history, will be named this season's most valuable player.

I thought it would be interesting to obtain a dog's POV (since Vick served 18 months in prison for betting on, and hosting dog fights at his palatial estate. Note: countless canines were tortured and killed by Vick and his posse). 

So, I turned to Mick Cody, an 8-year-old pit bull mix. An outspoken advocate of canine rights, Mick was literally panting at the opportunity to discuss Vick (if not disembowel him).

Rep: Thanks for finding time in your busy schedule, Mick.

Mick: No prob. I just finished a six-hour nap and, aside from needing to go bye-bye fairly soon, I've got a few minutes. Hey, how about a Beggin' Strip?

Rep: Sure. Here. Hey, nice catch. Great eye-jaw coordination. You're the Michael Vick of dogs.

Mick: Grrrrrrrr.

Rep: Sorry. So, what do you think about all the Vick buzz? He's an extraordinary athlete, no?

Mick: He's a murderer, pure and simple.

Rep: But, he paid his time in jail. Why not forgive and forget?

Mick: He was directly or indirectly responsible for the torture and deaths of hundreds of dogs. Considering the average pit lives for 12 human years, he should have been given a sentence of similar duration. And, he should NOT have been allowed to ever play football again! Woof!

Rep: Why not?

Mick: Because it sends the usual mixed signal you humans are so adept at. It's OK to decimate another species, spend a few months in prison and then return to a sport that pays you millions and millions of dollars annually. There’s something seriously wrong in that equation. You wouldn't ever let Dennis Kozlowski or Jeff Skilling run Fortune 500 businesses again, but you'll let a murderer play football again to sate Philly fans' insatiable need to win now. The Eagles should be ashamed of themselves. The team, not the birds. The birds are an impressive, if solitary lot. Another Beggin' Strip please.

Rep: OK. Wow, superb over-the-shoulder grab. Positively Vick-like.

Mick: Grrrrr.

Rep: Elaborate on the conditional love thing before you go bye-bye.

Mick: Sure. Eagles' fans are willing to conveniently forget all of Vick's horrible actions because he may be their ticket to The Super Bowl. That's conditional love. Me, I love you unconditionally whether you've forgotten to walk me or you've shown favoritism to my brother, Rooney. Not humans. You're the one who always quotes Paul McCartney when referencing past clients or flames: “Love has a nasty habit of disappearing overnight.” Me, I'll love you until I fetch my last bone or lift my last leg. That's unconditional love.

Rep: Final question. I noticed you were giving some serious paw pumps during last night's game as the Eagles dumped the Giants. Weren't you sending a mixed signal?

Mick: You raised me to love the Jets and hate the Giants. What's an obedient pooch to do?

Rep: Seems like even canines can be conflicted.

Mick: Not at all. I sleep like a log. In fact, that fireplace looks pretty, darn inviting. Later, Rep.

14 thoughts on “Mick vs. Vick: When the very worst becomes the very best

  1. I asked Mick to respond, Paul. He took time out from “doing his business” to pass this along: “I care about any and all cases of dog abuse, Paul. That said, how many people convicted of dog abuse are now earning millions upon millions of dollars every year to do what they love doing? My master asked me to comment specifically on Vick which I did. If you’re suggesting that my commenting on other cases of dog abuse would “require some actual work’ I strongly advise you not to wander into my backyard anytime soon.”

  2. Is the hypocrisy of whining endlessly about Mike Vick not blatantly obvious? Don’t people torture and mercilessly murder many forms of other animals everyday (often for sport, see fishing)? Is it okay because it’s legal? How utterly illogical is this line of thinking? Furthermore, can you ask Mick to comment on the thousands of other dog-fighters out there or doesn’t he care about those cases because they require some actual work to care about?

  3. Spot on, TJ. No one messes with man’s best friend. And, no one tortures and kills them and gets away with it. Vick may be living life large again, but there are many such as this blogger who will never forgive him.

  4. Thanks Julie. I asked Mick to respond. His post simply stated that corporate boards would never touch Kozlowski or Skilling. Both are toxic. And, while Milken is indeed raking in cash for leading seminars, he’s no longer allowed to trade on the exchange. Mick added that he’s been impressed with all the fundraising Milken’s done for prostate cancer research. He also joked that he once attacked a squirrel that reminded him of Milken’s wig.

  5. Mick’s passes along his thanks, Ozzie and Kip. He says he just asked a non dog for a POV on Vick. Pete the Opossum agrees with you two and Mick, and says that Vick is one sick puppy. Pete added, though, that American society is even sicker to allow miscreants (Pete’s word, according to Mick) such as Vick to literally get away with murder.

  6. It’s all very sad. Ultimate fighting is also a disgrace. I’m shocked, but not at all surprised, that it’s become so popular. Like football, it sates the primordial blood lust in man. Re: football specifically, there’s no question it becomes a meaner sport. In my opinion, all the trash talking and in-your-face player antics merely incite harder retaliatory shots from embarrassed opponents. It’s literally a vicious cycle.

  7. “You wouldn’t ever let Dennis Kozlowski or Jeff Skilling run Fortune 500 businesses again…” Mick, with all due respect, Michael Milken is still running successful financial seminars. That said, I do agree that canines have rights, too. And what Vick did is unforgivable.

  8. With all the Vick stuff resurfacing…why does Cock Fighting continue to get a pass. Is it cultural or is it the fact that we eat birds. You can find a high stakes Cock Fight in Washington Heights most days of the week. Cock fighting is state sponsored in the Dominican Republic…American Sports Stars like Pedro Martinez are front and center at Cock Fights but they have not suffered the negative feelings that Vick has correctly seen come his way. Even Jerry Seinfeld did an episode about “Little Jerry” in the ring. I guess Vick picked the wrong animals to kill.

  9. Mick — Ozzie and Kip here. Thanks for writing about Vick. We were having the same discussion in our house yesterday (Well, our owners were. We were napping). Being dogs, we ‘live in the now,’ as Cesar Milan says, so it’s easy for us to forgive our owners when they leave us at home too long, make us go outside to pee even in the rain, and don’t share every meal with us. But our instincts on which of you humans are trustworthy and which aren’t is as sound as our sense of smell. And we don’t trust Vick, nor the team’s management and ownership. You can’t teach an old dog new tricks (believe us; our owners have tried. We just howl laughing), and you can’t teach a guy who was willing to do such terrible things to suddenly be the new Dog’s Best Friend.

  10. Malcolm Gladwell had a fascinating piece in the New Yorker a few weeks back, in which he compared football to dogfighting in that we humans find entertainment in sports that essentially ensure the physical destruction of its participants. Gladwell’s article focused mainly on the idea that, despite the fact that increasing evidence shows that the concussive effects of football will render most players brain damaged by mid-life, we continue to enjoy the human sacrifice on display every Sunday. Not a far cry from the Coliseum days in Rome, I guess.

  11. Mick suggests that Vick instead be put inside a wire cage and forced to fight to the death with one of his co-conspirators. An eye for an eye and a claw for a claw.

  12. You’ll always be Book, Book. Mick told me after the interview that his larger issue is with the Philadelphia Eagles’ management. He called them ‘mongrels’ and blames them for Vick’s return. The canine knows his stuff.