Jets Coach Rex Ryan Tops Repman’s Annual Distrust Barometer

Trust_meter2n something of a surprise, beleaguered New York Jets football coach Red Ryan topped Repman's annual Distrust Barometer which the blogger describes as a completely bogus and superficial snapshot of skullduggery that rivals the far more rigorous and prestigious Edelman Trust Barometer.

The Distrust Barometer names the previous year's LEAST trustful people, places and things.

Repman said Ryan was a near unanimous selection for the top spot among voters (who include Former U.S. Congressdog Mick Cody, a few Manhattan Street people, 'Fireman Ed' the former Jets cheerleader, and commuters on Rep's NJ Transit 7:27am train to the city).

Repman explained why Ryan was voted Most Distrustful (or, least trustful, if you prefer):

“Ryan really lowered the bar in new and meaningful ways in 2012,” said the blogger. “First, after bragging his first three Jets teams would win successive Super Bowls, Ryan kicked off the 2012 campaign by importing Tim Tebow (who rode the bench all season long), continually supported QB Mark Sanchez (whose wickedly awful play would most likely now find him chosen last in any eighth grade pick-up touch football game) and punctuated his bald-faced lying by declaring this year's squad to be the most talented Jets team ever.” The Jets finished a dismal 6-10 and, somehow, some way, Ryan held onto his job.

The other top ten least distrustful people, places and things in Repman's 2012 barometer were:

2.) NJ Transit's North Jersey Coast Line (which, post Hurricane Sandy, simply refused to tell passengers if, and when, regular service would ever be returned). “Their utter contempt of courteous service was surpassed only by their refusal to communicate basic information.” said Repman. “They gave Coach Ryan a real run for his money.”

3.) United Airlines (whose CEO continued to star in pre-flight hagiographic videos heralding the arrival of 50 state-of-the-art Boeing 787 Dreamliners even WHILE said Dreamliners were busy being grounded by other airlines for faulty batteries, fires, etc.). “I've heard of CEOs being out of touch before, but this United guy must be living on Mars,” mused Repman.

4.) New York Mayor Bloomberg who, despite the carnage caused by Hurricane Sandy, continued to import power generators for Central Park and insist the New York Marathon be run (all while major parts of his town remained without heat or electricity). Repman called Bloomberg an updated, male version of Marie Antoinette.

5.) Alex Rodriguez, who despite his post steroid-fueled body's continued breakdown, chose to flirt with a couple of attractive female fans in the stands as his Bronx Bombers were being strafed and bombed by the Detroit Tigers. “The man redefines the expression dumb and dumber,” stated the list-obsessed blogger.

6.) Lance Armstrong. No explanation needed.

7.) Ed Moed, my business partner and co-founder who, throughout the year, promised to author a Repman guest blog, but never did.

8.) iPod headphone wires which, no matter the manufacturer, continued to endlessly torment this blogger by becoming hopelessly entangled and continually falling out of the ear cavities. “My kingdom for headphones that do neither,” pleaded Repman.

9.) The PR industry awards' programs, which continue to charge one price for all entries, thereby assuring large agencies can flood the judges with hundreds of entries while tiny ones can afford to submit one or two at most. “This disgraceful practice is PR's version of baseball's color barrier circa 1947,” noted the baseball trivia-loving Repman.

10.) The heinous person (or persons) who dognapped the stuffed animal facsimile of Pepper, Repman's late black lab, and the pooch for whom the agency was named. The plush dog once proudly greeted visitors to the agency's fifth floor. Speaking directly to the dognapper(s), Repman pleaded, “Have you no humanity? Or, in this case, caninity?”

Note: The Repman Distrust Barometer is unashamedly superficial and completely bogus. Yet, its author believes it to be the perfect counter balance to the brilliantly conceived and executed Edelman Trust Barometer. Repman would like to believe the REAL truth lies somewhere in-between the two polls.

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