Hats off to the high cholesterol folks at Burger King for introducing a new, lower fat french fry.
Called SatisFries (Seriously? That’s the best they could come up with?), the new fries are decidedly less artery-clogging than the slop McDonald’s has been serving for decades.
And, for that, I applaud the King.
Beating Ronald McDonald to the punch (with a seemingly breakthrough product) is akin to:
- Yahoo outflanking Google or Facebook
- Tiny Drew University topping Duke in college basketball
- Miley Cyrus outclassing Clare Danes.
It just doesn’t happen. And, I have to believe heads are rolling (or, guts being punched, as the case may be) in McDonald’s Oakbrook, Illinois, headquarters.
According to published reports, it took BK a full decade to develop the new fries. That’s longer than the time it took the U.S. space program to land a man on the moon! Just imagine if the dollars and manpower devoted to developing a low-fat fry had, instead, been directed towards educating young people about the dangers of fast food and an unhealthy diet. Oh well, the King has more important battles to fight, such as his mortal combat with Ronald.
Speaking of the latter, I can’t wait to see how Mickey D responds. Will they, too, admit their gruel could be a tad healthier and introduce a healthier Big Mac (talk about an oxymoron!)?
Or, will they order soda suppliers to add a little less sugar to their tooth-decaying, waistline expanding syrups?
Maybe they’ll introduce a Kinda Happy Meal (featuring less fat, less sodium and less mirth).
I’m betting McDonald’s stands pat (or, in their case, sit pat since they’ve been enabling a sedentary lifestyle since Eisenhower was president).
McDonald’s is the Disney of fat. They’ve turned indulgence into entertainment, and addicted generations of kids to a lifetime habit of unhealthy eating.
So, why fix what isn’t broken? If I’m in charge of McDonald’s marketing, I just sit back and watch the King try to change the mindset of a junk food junkie. Why spend money on a lost cause? There’s gold in them thar hills (and arches).