May 27

The ‘N’ Letter

Steve Cody wasn’t allowed through San Francisco Airport security this morning. Why? Because hisBoarding_pass
boarding pass read ‘Steve’ and his driver’s license reads ‘Steven.’ This raised all sorts of possible terrorist warnings to the crack TSA agent, who promptly sent me back to the ticket agent.

I dutifully trooped back, waited on line and explained what had just happened. The ticket agent sighed and said, “Where do they find these idiots?” She then logged onto her computer and began changing the reservation. But, lo and behold, the airline’s computer system wouldn’t allow her to do so because I was on the ‘open’ second leg of a round trip. Oh.

Now, she’s pissed. She has to grab her supervisor and explain the situation. I hear him exclaim, “You must be joking!”

Long story short, he handwrites some sort of hieroglyphics on the boarding pass and has the ticket agent personally escort me back to the surly, oh-so-vigilant TSA agent. He looks her over, looks me over, listens to her explanation and says, “I don’t like it one bit, but I’ll let him through. As for you (pointing to me),” he sniffs, “Next time you book a flight, do so with your full and correct legal name. Got it?” Got it. Yes sir. Thank you, sir. And thank you for defending our freedom and security, sir.

Gimme a break.

May 13

A market research company that doesn’t do market research

I love irony. The thicker, the better. How rich, then, is this voice mail?

“Hey Melissa, this is xxxxxxx xxxx calling from xxxxxxxxxxx. Um, I had been speaking with Dandy, and uh, I had been speaking with Steve Cody before he left Peppercom, um, regarding market research with you guys. So when you have a moment if you could give me a call at xxx-xxx-xxxx. If you want to check us out online before you call we’re at Thanks, Melissa.”

This poor guy not only believes that ‘…Steve Cody no longer works for Peppercom, but he’s also trying to pitch his market research company’s services to our very own Melissa Vigue. Ouch!

No need to expound on the damage a market researcher who doesn’t do market research can wreak on a market research company’s image and reputation (and, try saying that line three times fast).

May 08

Cody curse becomes a verb

Business travel has become so bad that everyone is ‘Cody Cursed.’ In fact, friends and family alike nowPlane
use the once ‘inner circle-only’ catch phrase to describe their most recent business trip from hell (i.e. ‘I’ve been Cody Cursed on my way to Denver. We have an indefinite delay.’ Or ‘Sure enough, the plane landed on time, but I was Cody Cursed with a no-show limo driver.’).

I’m less-than-thrilled to report that I’ve been Cody Cursed once again. My return flight from O’Hare two nights ago was early (‘That’s right, ladies and gentlemen. We should be in Newark a full 30 minutes early tonight,’ bellowed our effervescent captain). But, once we were on the ground, bingo, the good ol’ curse kicked in again (‘Ah, ladies and gentlemen, Captain Stanley Kowalski here. As I said, we did arrive early but, unfortunately, there’s no gate for us. As a result, we’ll taxi on over to an open area and wait. So, sit back, relax and as soon as we have an update, well I’ll be right back in touch.’). Piss off.

Thirty minutes later and we’re still sitting. At least, I can feel some comfort in the knowledge that, along with Kleenex and Xerox, the Cody Curse has become a generic term. A ‘Murphy’s Law’ in the air, if you will.  And, that’s a good thing (except, that is, when you’re caught in the middle of one).